“The Power of
Mum”
You wouldn’t
think it to look at him, but Tiggy, our sweet little SUV, is cursed. He has
only required annually scheduled servicing since he was purchased in 2010 and,
on the whole, he rocks. Ter and I are madly in love with him. He’s safe, solid,
dependable, quick as a lizard, fierce as a tiger, and cute as the proverbial
button.
Except after
he’s been serviced. Here’s the history:
2011 – Tig’s
first scheduled service and I’m sure something happened the next day, but perhaps
this is only because something did
happen the following year... and the one after that ... and the one after that
...
2012 – on her
way to work the day after Tig’s second scheduled service, Ter hears a loud bang! and the steering goes funky. She
pulls over immediately to discover the far rear tire is flat as a pancake. When
the tow truck arrives, the driver shows her the chunk of metal responsible for
the gaping hole in the tire’s tread. Eyes wide, she gasps, “When did I pick that up?”
“Oh, right now,”
the guy assures her. The tire is shot but the dealer doesn’t carry that model,
so it takes a couple of days (and a couple hundred dollars) to get Tig a new
shoe.
2013 – on her
way to work the day after Tig’s third scheduled service, Ter is rear-ended when
the guy behind her doesn’t see that traffic ahead has stopped. Tiggy weathered
it fairly well, but Ter was whiplashed and to this day is still in treatment
for it. Tig spent two days in the shop and is sporting a new rear bumper, paid
for courtesy of the other guy’s insurance. Needless to say, both Ter and Tiggy
are now hyper-nervous about tailgaters. I merely wish that a flame-throwing
exhaust pipe was an option, ’cause I’d have ordered one while he was in for
repairs.
2014 – on her
way to work the day after Tig’s fourth scheduled service (and immediately
following a chiropractic adjustment), Ter is merging onto the highway when
Tiggy *binks* at her. She’s
accustomed to his *bink* – usually
he’s signalling that the temperature is ripe for snow, so she’s actually about
to say, “Tig, it is not going to
snow!” What emerges is a sharp, “Crap, Tiguan! What the hell is this?”
The tire
pressure warning light has engaged. Panicked and in pain, she gets him to the
dealer, where a technician is corralled to inspect all four tires. The
diagnosis is a computer glitch—a fair assessment, since immediately after the
tire incident in 2012, the same light went on, Ter had the same panic attack,
and it turned out that the computer needed resetting to acknowledge the new tire.
Present day mystery solved—but while the car is here, the part they ordered to
fix the oil leak has come in, so can she leave it with them for the day?
What oil leak?
Oh, the one that
had been discovered during inspection and supposedly fixed the day before.
Apparently the service associate thought the fix had been made, but such was
not the case. Ter is really steaming now – she has to interview a new finance
clerk in the afternoon so she must
get to the office. Hand it to the service staff at the shop—they rallied to
take care of her and her leaky little
SUV. She got a courtesy car and Tiggy got his oil leak fixed. He was also
washed twice in two days; more baths than he’s had all winter.
We’re now in the
clear … until his next service appointment in 2015.
I’m only
superstitious about hockey games, but this after-service curse is getting
ridiculous. In a weird way, and perhaps unwittingly but one never knows, I
think Mum might be responsible. Years ago, once Ter and I had agreed to replace
our beloved Jules, the time came to tell my parents what we were getting. We
knew going in that it could cause a ripple because my folks were kids in
Scotland during WW II and Tiggy is ...
... a
Volkswagen.
Dad took the
news pretty well, but my stalwart-rebel-Scottish-nationalist mother was
uncommonly reserved. After a while, she quietly confessed, “My dears, I am
sorry, but I remember what the Germans did to us during the war.”
Giving the
sentiment due consideration, we bought the VW anyway. Gods bless her, Mum says
she’s forgiven us (as if we were ever in danger of being disowned—that’s Dad’s gig), but I suspect that deep
inside, whenever she looks at our Tiguan, she winces. Ja, he’s German.
He nags like a Nazi and makes you sit up straight. He runs like a military machine
and thinks he’s superior to every other car on the road … but he’s our little
tank and we love him so, Mum, can you please do something about lifting the
hex?
Yes please Mum...my old heart and my old body will be forever grateful!
ReplyDeleteWell now!
ReplyDeleteThese blogs are a great idea, but..........
I think we participants should agree to the following waiver......
"It has never been and is not now, or ever will be, the intent of any blog or comment on a blog, to cause distress, ill feeling or rancor to any family member mentioned herein."
This will negate any apology for the blog, or apology for the comment on the blog, or apology for the apology for the comment on the blog, or apology for the apology for the apology well, by now, you get the idea I hope.
And, if the foregoing offends any who read it, then of course, I apologize.
With many apologies,
Dad.
It is never my intent to cause upset, Dad. Having already toasted Mum's hairdo once, I realize I am skating on thinner ice than my hockey team. I am also relieved that she, at least, has forgiven me for employing some artistic license for the sake of a good story.
DeleteBeing possessed of a semi-engineering mind, I have great respect and admiration for the Germans, too. Stay tuned for Auto Bio XI, or "How I Came to Own a Volkswagen" ...